contemplations, realizations, and wishs

So the other day i was sitting in Rm 3 contemplating the recent events of the week and realized that this time next year it'll all be pretty much over...
the petty little dramas,
the endless classes,
the waiting,
the watching.
i read somewhere that over 90% of the people you meet in high school you'll never see again,
i don't want it to be that way...
i honestly love our little lunch time group so much..
i don't want it to end..
like it'll be weird waking up each day knowing im not going to see you all,
that were not going to have another fun day Monday,
ill never make up a reason for all the bibles in math class,
ill never sass the teachers again..

i love this all so much.... i dont want it to end...

its something that as kids we wished would happen quickly,
now i just want it to slow down..
maybe peter pan was right when he said that growing up is a trap..

why cant it slow down??

conversations, new things, and a moonwalking shetland??

ive had some really great conversations lately, especially when ive put myself out there and done something different, tried something new.. ive found that theres so many cool people out there and i didnt realize it.. its mindblowing really :) just like the fact that this pony can moonwalk.. my friend kim showed it too me a couple of weeks ago and i forgot about it till now.. it actually makes my day, like we all have something uniquely individual about us and if we put ourselves out there its gonna be a good time haha..

hope it makes your day as much as it made mine :)

xoxox lavinia

planning dreams

  

i dream. always have. always will. planning? im OCD about that.. everything has to be perfect otherwise like ugh... but ive been putting alot of thought into my future and what i want to do with my life, i dont really know, like at the moment im toying with the idea of becoming a psychologist but im not entirely sure.. i guess ultimately its in Gods hands but i honestly just wish i was one of those kids whos had their whole life planned out since they were 5.. ill be honest, i dont and i never have and probably never will.. it seems like im always the last person to know about things.. especially the important things..i have dreams but i dont necessarily want to make them plans...i just wish i knew... 

xoxox lavinia